Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Well, the little 12 foot X 12 foot bedroom hubby and I slept in is now a "multi-purpose room". When caring for Mother, we kept her in the bigger bedroom due to her might needing medical equipment, visiting nurses and the like. But, now, I have moved in the TV, some futon chairs, 3 drawer dresser for my beads, and this closet/office set up. Beads, yarn, computer graphic books, Wii, are all now in one place. This is the first time I have ever had my "own" working space! For the past 30+ years, I have just "stolen" bits of space in the house. WOW! It's difficult to explain how I am feeling.
I also want to thank everyone for "hanging" in there with me. I know I haven't been around like I used to be. I believe I threw myself into redoing this little house to "work" thru grief and all the stages of it. Even with redoing emotions ran very high. As with the bay window-to see the "old windows open" after 40 years, brought back feelings and emotions like a tidal wave hitting the shore. Growing up in this house were the "best" days of my life as a teenager. I wish my parents could see how all the changes. As I do do some things, I can hear my father, in his soft way, explain techniques of sanding, staining, painting and general home repairs. Never raising his voice, even if I made a mistake. My mother, telling me how to make things safe, such as the "night lights" for the bathroom, kitchen, phone and the like. Securing cabinets with simple dowels thru the handles.
Most of the times when I finish for the day, I can hear and see the gentle "ghosts" of the past. All the love from then, infuses with today to make not only myself comfortable, but anyone who visits.
Thank you all again.